The Name Game

So as you might obviously know, I use my Pagan name, Sigrún Hildiwulf Freyskona, on this website as well as in my writings for publication.  I am in the process of getting my legal name changed to this, for various reasons, but since I've been using my Pagan name online and in networking offline for far longer than I have had the process going for changing it completely, I have this essay exploring the right reasons to have a Pagan name... and the wrong reasons.

Back when I was a n00b to Paganism I decided I wanted a spooky and mysterious Craft name, and did some arcane numerology foo to come up with Aja, the most attractive-sounding name in a list of "harmonious" names for my magickal practice.  I went by the name of Aja when dealing with other Craft people until the year 2000, when I decided to become Asatru after some time of study.  In my dedication Blot, I asked Odin to name me.  I did this because I had read Grimnirsmal and figured He must have all those 200+ heiti for a reason, and since I was formally changing religions, I should have a new name.

Odin paused, looked at me funny, and said, "Are you sure you want Me to name you, and the responsibility that comes with the name?"

Being young, dumb, and over-enthusiastic, I told Him to just name me already, so He gave me the name of Sigrún.

About two years later I found out Sigrún is the name of the Valkyrie in the Saga of Helgi Hundingsbane: Helgi, a mortal warrior, is wed to Sigrún, a Valkyrie, and later on her brother, Daeg, slays him and Sigrún exacts revenge on her brother.  I didn't know what to think of this at the time, or of the connection between that and the fact that Freyja was the first Deity I ever worked with on a regular intense basis.  I also found out around the same time that Aja is a well-known porn star who is also Asatru.  In hindsight I perhaps should have kept the name.  I'm just saying.

As expected, later after that, Freyja came calling and told me She had a job ticket for me to do occasional Valkyrie work, that is, protective and offensive magick that involves trance states, faring forth, etc, usually on behalf specific people who She sent my way looking for help.

Later on, I also looked into the esoteric meaning, that being "Rune of Victory".  Sig is also the Germanic name of the rune Sowilo, the rune of the sun.  I am one of Frey's Lightbringers, and it does seem very much like a recurring theme in my life is pressing on despite insurmountable odds, and achieving.

The middle name, Hildiwulf, came much later and was given to me by Angrboda, in a dream I had where I was in the Iron Wood and going through an initiation ceremony.  Angrboda's "tough love" has been helpful in processing PTSD issues based in experiences with a dysfunctional family, and Her naming of me was a turning point with some of my long-held attitudes and figuring out what I was going to do about owning my shit.  Since most people are used to me being Sigrún, I can't say "No, call me this instead." Nor do I want to disrespect Odin by chucking the name He gave me.  So what I did was added Hildiwulf as the middle part of my Pagan name, and I'm really hoping after this, Nobody expects me to put Their names for me out there for all to see.  Because I do have a couple of other names -- there's Leofrið, which Frey gave me, and some others I don't want to share publicly.

(Loki has joked around that Angrboda gave me the middle name of Hildiwulf so "Sigrun H. Freyskona!" could be used as an expletive by the "doing it wrong" crowd.  But then, Loki says a lot of things.)

I find it to be rather ironic that my first name is that of a Valkyrie, and my second name means "battle wolf", and yet many have remarked on how nice, warm, and fuzzy I am (except when I'm ranting and even then I try to make people laugh).  I think it might be precisely because I'm nice, warm, and fuzzy that the Gods, especially Angrboda, want me to be aggressive once in awhile, although I would still like to think I'm nice, warm, and fuzzy most of the time.

On the note of warm fuzziness, Sigrún has oft been shortened into its dimunitive "Siggy", and my other half coined the name "Siggymonster" because he and several others think I am very Muppet-like.  I like being called Siggy, and so if you feel you must use the name Odin gave me to be respectful of the Allfather, please call me Siggy.  It works for me.
While I guess you could say it is an honor that Odin and Angrboda both gave me names and I bear "Freyswoman" as my surname, I didn't see until 2006 when I finally had consistent Internet access (as in, I am extremely behind the times) the value of having a Pagan identity and keeping it separate from one's mundane identity.  At this point in time (fall 2008) I am not allowed anymore to keep my Pagan and mundane identities separate (although I still don't have to get into religious conversations with my grocery checker or my dentist, thank Gods), but I can see how having a Pagan name is useful for those who want some added privacy. 

Rather than the multiple names being seen as pretentious or fluffy, I think that for a God to name you is something you can't just casually shrug off, and just as Odin has multiple heiti  for the different faces He shows -- Bolverk is different than Grimnir, which is different than Jalkr, which is different than Hangatyr -- those of us who are Named will find that we also show different faces which require different names.

There is, of course, a way to "do it wrong" when choosing and using a Pagan name, if you are just tuning into the Internet, you will find many cheesy websites done by "Lord Merkin Morningwood" and other people of that ilk.  The meme of the Pagan Name Generator came about precisely because this sort of thing has been overdone and yet it doesn't seem to be going away. 

So my advice to you is, if you want to have a Pagan name, please ask yourself some questions:

1. Why am I doing this?  Am I doing this for security reasons (e.g. protecting my mundane identity)?  To symbolize a change within my consciousness?  To align with the Gods and spirits I work with?

2. Does my name make sense?  Is it hard to read with a straight face?  If I have a name based on the language of an ethnic or cultural group, is it too hard for others to pronounce?  If I have multiple names that I am using simultaneously (as in a first name and surname), are they in the same language?

3. If I have named myself after a mythological character, am I prepared to intellectually defend my choice of name if challenged?  Ditto if I have named myself after someone in LOTR or Harry Potter?

4. If a Deity has named me, am I prepared to accept the responsibility of what comes with bearing that name?  Names do mean something.  To give something a name is to give it power, and people often become their names.

I hope this gives a little insight into my headspace, and safe journeys in your own naming games.

(C) 2008 Sigrun Freyskona.